Monday, April 03, 2006

ON THE DECAYED BLACK FAMILY

Black Blogress La Shawn speaks some much needed but very "incorrect" truths. Excerpt:

Many black children grow up in fatherless homes. Mothers may love their children and may be the best parents in the world, but even the Greatest Mother of All Time (whoever she is) can't take the place of a father. Fatherlessness correlates with juvenile crime, drug use, academic underachievement, premarital sex, and many other problems, I'm sure.

I'm one of these religious folks who believes that Adam and Eve existed and that God knew exactly what he was doing when he made them uniquely for his purposes. In the years I've spent on this planet, I clearly see that men and women are different and that it is good. Their God-given roles are different, and each role complements the other.

Generally, mothers feel an intense attachment to their children that men do not. That's not to say fathers don't have an attachment to their kids. Fathers may love them with all their hearts and minds, but "mother love" is different. Babies grow inside the mother. Mothers labor to give birth to their babies. Many mothers breastfeed their babies. Mothers tend to "baby" their children, but that's OK because "father love" is there to balance it out.

Men have no idea what it's like to have another human being feeding off their bodies, sharing the same nutrients. They have no clue what it means to give birth to another human being. This makes women profoundly different than men when it comes to raising children. Generally, fathers feel an urge to physically protect their children. Women also have this urge, but it's not exactly the same. I believe a woman's physical attachment to her child is of a different quality than the man's. We've all heard that mothers nurture and fathers discipline. Both parents do these things, but in general, women are more emotional and "touchy-feely" than men. Both parents understand that children need nurturing and discipline, but each parent does more of one than the other.

At this point some of you may be saying, "Wait a second, you don't know what it's like to give birth, either." True, and although I may never give birth, I was created with the capacity to give birth. I have the necessary biological system (including the hormones!). As such, I can speak about these things with more insight than someone not made to carry a human being inside his body.

Still with me? Remind yourselves as you read this post that I'm speaking in general terms. There will always be exceptions.

Back to God. There is harmony in the way he created the two sexes and the family unit. It's as though they were meant to be joined together. And I came up with that all by myself! They are meant to be joined together, and you don't have to be a Bible-believing Christian to understand that.

Without "father love," children grow up missing an important part of their development. That's not to say they grow up without men, but no brother or uncle or boyfriend or "friend" can ever take the place of a father. In fact, no man could ever take the place of a biological residential father. When children grow up with a mother and father living in the same house, whether family life is ideal or not, they see each role in action. Personalities differ, so in some cases, the mother will be a stronger disciplinarian than the father. The point is that children grow up observing how their parents interact and how they treat each other. A boy learns what it is to be a man by watching his father. There are lousy fathers out there who live with their kids, but there are many more who're honorable and decent.

I believe that just as parents have biological urges directed toward their children, children have biological urges toward their parents. Even if a child has never known a father, there is something in him that needs a father, whether he realizes it or is able to articulate it. Some have speculated that fatherless boys join gangs to receive the "father love" they didn't have at home.

This absence of "father love" continues to manifest itself once children reach puberty. Fatherless children, especially girls, are more likely to engage in premarital sex. They don't get to observe their parents' marriage and the role each parent assumes. Unless there are loving, strong, and involved men in a boy's life, he's cheated out of learning how women should be treated.

Without the benefit of seeing a man (who loves him) go to work to provide for him, come home, discipline him, interact with his mother and treat her well, a boy can't emulate the behavior. He has to learn a "female version" of it and/or get it in bits and pieces from whichever male figure is handy. While he may frequently interact with related males (uncle, grandfather, etc.), without the chance to observe the marital relationship of his parents up close and personally, a large part of his father/husband training is missing.

I repeat, no matter how good a mother a woman is, she cannot make up for this missing part. A single mother can try - in fact, she must try - to socialize her son to be a good father and faithful husband, but she will fall far short of the goal because the father's role is crucial in the boy's development.

I repeat, I am speaking in general terms. Fatherless boys can and do grow up to be good fathers and faithful husbands, but with only a third of black children raised in two-parent families, many fatherless boys won't experience life as a responsible father and committed husband, but only as a "baby's daddy."



Women and Money

Egalitarians, with a boost from Statistics Canada, are all in a lather over the fact that women are "losing the battle of the sexes" in terms of their "earning power." We are informed that too many of them - 67% - prefer the "pink ghetto" to the Boardroom, the same percentage as a decade ago, and the level of female managers (oh, the national shame of it!) has "dropped back" to where it was two decades ago. So we are said to be "losing the war for general equality." In light of the higher numbers of educated women today, Statistics Canada is surprised by "the continuing stubborn wage gap," and by the number of women still working in traditionally female jobs.

Egads! More impenetrable national stupidity here. A little voice asks: what if women prefer the so-called pink ghetto? And anyway, who says women and men must crave the same jobs, and earn the same pay? Never-married women and never-married men in Canada have always earned about the same wages. Actually, the last time I investigated this ridiculous battle of the sexes, there were a couple of decades of life shown where never-married women earn more than never-married men.

Fact is that the great majority of healthy women not already brain-washed by a materialistic commercial society do not crave money and job status. They do not want the Boardroom. They want a strong male earner in the bedroom. And from him they want healthy beautiful babies, a happy family, and a financially secure life. That is what they have craved since they were teenagers. Some of them get it. But far too few.

Statistics Canada's own figures on the earnings of never-married women show that what causes the so-called "wage-gap" is the natural female preference for marriage and children over commercial work outside the home. Mothers refuse jobs that are too demanding or switch to part-time work so they can fulfill their own ambition to raise their kids properly.

Some cannot afford to turn down money, however, and it is a national scandal that millions of them have become wage-dupes of all the modern welfare states that so badly needs their tax dollars. Such states strive to keep as many men and women in the work-force as possible paying as much in taxes as possible so the state can take over life's most meaningful functions such as child-rearing in government daycare centres, education in government schools, social-welfare needs in government housing and programs, and care of the sick in government-controlled hospitals and old-age homes.

Don't buy it. Fight back. Encourage every man you know to be a real man. Take a better job. Work harder. If the good wife loves working outside the home, fine. But if she is trapped there, then let's encourage husbands to go for a pay raise to get the mothers of their own children out of the work force and raising the kids at home. Shame on Statistics Canada for partaking in this number-juggling scam.

Source

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